The Key to Happiness

Happiness is an inside job.  We all know that, but sometimes our actions tell a different story. You just have to look at the way people act to see what they’re thinking.

If you pay close attention to what brings many people happiness you’ll soon realize that it’s based on what’s happening in their outer world.  The logic being that having things a certain way on the outside will make them happy on the inside.

At least that’s what we’re taught.   Just think about when you were very little.  The ice cream man showed up and you were filled with delight.  Santa delivered those presents on Christmas Eve and you were ecstatic. When you got what you wanted on the outside, you were happy on the inside.  The stimulus created the response.  The having created the happiness.

A great number of people still do this. I heard a friend of mine once say, “We just can’t get things to click, but when she’s happy I’m happy.”  It’s no crime to be happy for others, just don’t make it a habit to rely on outer circumstances to create your own happiness.  If you can only find happiness when others are happy around you then It’s a sign of attachment.

Realize this: being happy is your job.  It’s job #1.

The whole problem with “having to create happiness” is that you’re relying on outer circumstances to be absolutely perfect. But what if they’re not perfect? Then what? Are you going to wait it out until it is? And what if it’s only perfect for a few hours or even a few minutes? Are you only going to be happy for a few minutes and then go back to feeling miserable?

It’s craziness if you ask me.   You never want to rely on your outer circumstances to create the way you feel. Start training yourself to be happy right now without needing to have everything perfect on the outside.  Start from within. Here are 5 questions to get you started so that you can bring more happiness into your life.

5 Questions to Bring More Happiness Into Your Life

  1. What am I most passionate about in my life today?
  2. What am I proudest of in my life today?
  3. What am I happiest about in my life today?
  4. What is the deepest desire that I would like to express in my life today?
  5. How can I contribute to others in a way that brings me more happiness today?

Remember, happiness is an inside job.   Start every morning by asking higher level questions and you’ll get higher level thoughts.  Those higher level thoughts will always lead to higher level feelings and slowly over time you’ll soon realize that the key to happiness is never something outside of you.  It’s always on the inside :)

If you liked this article, you may also like: The No.1 Strategy to Make You Feel Better


  • Yun

    Reply Reply January 18, 2010

    I was driving a 20 year old high school kid’s old car around town yesterday (my own car broken down). A thought came to this is sad, then another thought that this is funny… Our mind play tricks with us about “we are happy or not”. So, happiness is insider’s job, put our mind into good work. Well said. Thank you.

  • cindy

    Reply Reply January 18, 2010

    Thanks Steve.. and yes, well said!!

    Now that I’ve been single for the past year. I realized that every relationships I was in, I would always put them first, and forget about my own need. I’m now focusing on my self again, and this feels great.

  • Steve

    Reply Reply January 19, 2010

    Hi Yun,

    I really like that, “this is sad, then this is funny…” because as you said our mind likes to play tricks on us. As John Kehoe once said, “Our mind is the great trickster.”

    Choose a thought and use it or your thoughts will choose you.

  • Chase

    Reply Reply January 26, 2010

    Well written and really good stuff. The key is inside your own mind. I’ve been reading Joseph Murphy’s The Power of Your Subconscious Mind; that’s how I found your article. Note: I wouldn’t space so much after the sentences — that is too old school and too distracting, But, that’s just me. Take care…

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